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mean Christians

December 6, 2011 in how to be a christian, when faith is hard with 2 Comments

So the title of this could sound like I’m going to rant and complain about mean Christians, but that’s not really what this is about.

Here’s one thing I know to be true: Humans are sinful.
All of them. Me. You. People who go to church. People who don’t go to church.

One of the things I am so thankful to have learned early on in my walk with God is to never decide anything about who God is based only on the actions of His people.

I have been treated horribly be people who say they love God, read His Word and pray every day. It’s something I am not sure I will ever understand. I can’t even get angry about something without feeling guilty and having to repent to the person I got angry with. How can people who say they follow God treat people like garbage and then just go on as if nothing is wrong?

This is a question with no answer. And it doesn’t even do me any good to even ponder it. There is no answer – except maybe the one I’ve already pointed out. People are sinful. People can do mean, selfish and awful things.

But that doesn’t change who God is.

I’ve seen people get burned by Christians and walk away from God. I’ve seen young people witness such hypocrisy by those that call themselves Christians, that they walk away from the faith. I’ve seen people who have decided their worth based on the opinions of those around them rather than the One who created them.

While it is true that those who follow Christ should reflect Jesus in their actions, that doesn’t always happen.
But that doesn’t change who God is: faithful, loving, ever-patient, long suffering, good. He is the source. The creator. And yet he wants to know us intimately. He is truly amazing. Nothing changes that.

It’s so important for us to know Him. Not just be around His people. Hanging out at church or Bible Study or youth group can help you learn about God. It can help you develop empathy and love and compassion and lots of really good things. But that is no substitute for knowing Him and just spending time with Him. Just you and Him. He is the source of life.

That way, when people fail you – and they will – then you always have a safe harbor in Him. Life might press you down, but it can’t destroy you because you’ll know Him as your strong fortress. Your deliverer. Your ever-present help in times of trouble.

These words sound so simple and yet they have been tried and tested in the fires of my heart this year. So the words might be small, but the truth is big because He is big. Bigger than we can ever imagine.

For who is God, but the Lord?
And who is a rock, except our God,
The God who girds me with strength,
And makes my way blameless?
He makes my feet like hind’s feet,
And sets me upon my high places.
He trains my hands for battle,
So that my arms can bend a bow of bronze.
Thou hast also given me the shield of salvation,
And they right hand upholds me;
And thy gentleness makes me great.
Thou dost enlarge my steps under me,
And my feet have not slipped.
Psalm 18: 31-36

People will fail you. But God will never fail you. Yes there are storms that shake us. Paths that rattle us. Uncertainty that scares us. But if we are willing to trust Him and His will for us, then He will take us to places we never imagined. Eventually. That’s the journey. And I wouldn’t trade that journey for anything. So don’t ever give up on Him – because He will never give up on you.

Do not fear.

Sarah

lady in waiting

September 8, 2011 in destiny & purpose, feeling lonely & unloved, real life & faith with 0 Comments

We are all in waiting. We are all waiting for that next bend in the road*. Waiting for that next big thing. It’s a natural desire but one that is a bit of a trap. The question “what are you waiting for” isn’t really the best question.

“Who” are you waiting for?

Life changes constantly and yet there is only one constant. The great I AM. I hear from so many young women who write – feeling desperate and lonely and full of longing to be loved and adored. They wonder why God doesn’t answer their prayers. They wonder why God “doesn’t work”. They wonder why God doesn’t “do something.”

These letters are so hard. You can hear the pain. You can see the tears between the words. And yet the answer is not what they want to hear. The truth is, God can and does work in powerful and amazing ways. But the way He works can look far different than what we want. He is way more interested in our hearts and our character than He is on our circumstance. He has the perspective of eternity that we lack.

These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold–though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world. 1 Peter 1:7

Our faith is more precious than gold. Our faith – in Him. Not in some change of circumstance. Not in some guy or girl. Not in some job. Or some house. Or some goal. But Him. Trusting that even if injustice prevails for a season, God is still in control. Trusting that He has a plan for us that is good. That He will never leave us. He will never forsake us. And that He loves us more than we can ever imagine.

The kind of faith that says, “It doesn’t matter whether you say yes or no to ________, I will serve you and trust you with all of my heart.”

How do we get there? Get your eyes off the circumstance and focus on Him. Spend time devouring His Word. Spend time in worship. Pour your heart out to Him in prayer. But then say, “But not my will – but Your will be done.”

However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth? Luke 18:8

I’m praying for you today.

~Sarah~

*can you name the movie? “There’s no bend in my road.”

the words of you

July 12, 2011 in body image & God, feeling lonely & unloved, real life & faith with 0 Comments

I’d like you to get a piece of paper and a pencil if you can.

Now – without thinking too much about it – write down 3 words that describe you. Not about what you do in relationship with someone else (student, wife, child, etc.) but descriptive words.

beautiful? broken? valuable? worthless? talented? desired? wise? stupid?

I’ve struggled over the years with the words I speak about myself. I’m usually pretty quick to think the best about others, but just as quick to think the worst of myself. (And even as I write that down I think, “No one else struggles with that kind of thing! Why admit that?) But in my head I know that I am not alone. We talked about how words from others can kill our dreams or try to derail us but here’s the thing…

The words we speak about ourselves hold even more power.

We cannot trash who we are because we were found valuable enough for the God of the Universe to send His Son to die in our place. We were worth saving – He loved us that much! We have purpose. Yes, we are all flawed, but that is where even more glory goes towards God. When He works through us in spite of our weakness. When He helps us accomplish things that would be impossible without Him. He gets the glory when we point to Him, instead of pointing out what’s wrong with us.

Ask God to help you see the way He sees you. The beauty, the worth, the value He sees in you.

Now, write down 3 words that you think Jesus would use to describe you. Imagine He is talking to the Father and He points over to you, what would he say?

Allow the love of God to penetrate your heart today.

~Sarah~

guys are like vegetables?

July 11, 2011 in feeling lonely & unloved, singleness & faith with 0 Comments

Photo by WordRidden - used under Creative Commons LicenseThere is probably no topic that is more difficult for young adults than singleness. That longing – a God-given one – to be connected with someone. To be married. I’m definitely a proponent of “let God be in control of your love life” but it’s just hard when you’re single…and waiting.

I graduated college at 21 years old and I had never had a boyfriend. In fact, I only had one real date (and it was just pathetic so we’ll just be truthful for the record but move on.)

I didn’t become a Christian until I was nearly 18 so the “rules” of dating in the Christian world were a bit bizarre to me at first. People got together (and dumped each other) in the name of “God’s leading”. I watched my friends get their hearts crushed and yet still wondered if anyone would ever find me “worth” it.

I did believe that God loved me and cared for me but…and here’s the confession, I had this secret fear that God would bring me someone that was “good for me”. Someone who was more like brussel sprouts rather than red velvet cake. Someone who I was “supposed” to be with rather than someone I couldn’t imagine my life without.

This fear was compounded when I went to an InterVarsity camp and met a woman who was 30, loved God and was still single. My calculations left me not only with brussel sprouts and many years of waiting in front of me!

I happen to know several amazing young women who are still in that waiting phase as they approach their thirties. It does happen. And we won’t be able to see or understand the fullness of God’s plan or ways until we meet Him face to face.

But I can say – without a doubt – that God knows better than we do. In fear, we can sometimes agree to or pursue relationships because we wonder if anyone else will come along. But God doesn’t give us someone who is just good for us, He gives us – if we will wait for his best – someone who is both good for us AND someone we can’t imagine our lives without. There are brussel sprouts. But there is also red velvet cake for dessert.

~Sarah, who just celebrated 16 years with her guy ~

words that kill

July 8, 2011 in feeling lonely & unloved, real life & faith, women & faith with 1 Comment

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When I was 15, I mentioned to my mother – on a whim – of how I dreamed of writing a book one day. She told me – crushingly – that I couldn’t do it, but that my friend Jen had real talent when it came to writing.

I gave up writing that day*. After all, if I didn’t have the talent, why bother? Words have power:

The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. (Proverbs 18:21)

We can’t control what other people say to us. Ever. People will give us sweet words of encouragement and love & others will give us words that are meant to crush and kill.

But what will do with those words? How can we protect our hearts?

I think the key is here:

In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. (Eph. 6:16)

1 – Realize where the words are coming from: satan. We can sometimes get distracted with the person that’s saying them but even Jesus rebuked Peter when the words he spoke did not match with the truth of God. (Mt. 16:23) If the words are a lie, then the source behind those words is an enemy who wants to steal from us, kill us & destroy us. Don’t let him. Choose to believe what God says.

2 – Don’t accept them. Weigh them against the word of God – does God (in His Word) say those words are true? If not, choose to believe what God says.

3 – Fill yourself with the truth. The more we know and hear and receive the Word of God, the easier it becomes to reject those words that do not speak truth. God’s word cleanses us and restores us to truth.

You are loved by God. You are never alone. Those are true words. We can sometimes feel alone and unloved, but that doesn’t mean it’s true. May you be surrounded with the love of God today.

~Sarah~

*My mom was wrong apparently. Just finished the revisions for my 6th novel. And I’m very thankful that God decided to use even a broken vessel like me to point to Him.

Photo (Flickr: Lel4nd) Used under Creative Commons License

who’s making these plans anyway?

May 17, 2011 in college life & faith, destiny & purpose, real life & faith, your faith plan with 0 Comments

I used to like making plans. From the time I was 10, I planned on becoming an actress with the full awareness that I could end up eating cat food and living in a closet in NYC. I was willing because it was my dream. Then I went away to college and met this person named Jesus. He changed my life – but my plans stayed the same up until my junior year of college. I figured He had just joined me on my journey, but it turns out He wanted me to join Him on a different journey. I was walking down campus walk when I heard God’s voice for the first time. It wasn’t some audible booming “from the sky” kind of voice, but I knew immediately it was God.

“Drop your theater major.”

It was the end of my junior year and I had one more class left to complete my theater major. It made no sense to drop the major. But as sure as I was that it was God’s voice, I was also sure of something else. In those few small words God was asking me a question: Will you choose theater? Or will you choose me?

I didn’t even hesitate. I didn’t even go back to my room and think about it. I walked right into the registrar office and filled out the paperwork and it was done. Theater Major gone. Since I was double major I was able to continue with my psychology major and graduate on time without any delay but the impact on me was significant.

Theater was my plan and passion but God showed me it had become an idol in my heart – something I wanted more than I wanted God. God doesn’t share our hearts with idols so the idol had to go. And it hasn’t been the only time I’ve had to lay something on the altar and choose to follow His plan rather than my own.

There’s a way that seems right to a man but in the end it leads to death. (Proverbs 14:12)

Real life. Abundant life. The life we are meant to live. It’s not found in making plans. It’s found in the One who is the Maker of all. If we follow Him – He’ll get us to where we’re supposed to be. But in order to choose Him, we have to turn away from our self. Are we wanting God to simply bless us as on our journey? Or do we want to join God on His journey? I have seen too much of God’s faithfulness to want anything more than Him. What He wants. I know that He’s got a much better plan than me anyway!

Anything that you need to let go of today?

Dear Lord Jesus, help us to lay down our own plans and desires so that we can follow You with our full hearts. Help us to focus on what You’ve given us to do today and trust you with the rest. Help us to not get caught up in making plans and instead help us to get caught up in knowing You more fully. Thank you for the gift of your son so that we can fully belong to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

who is waiting for who?

May 9, 2011 in destiny & purpose, monday manna devotional, questions about faith with 1 Comment

I think one of the statements I see most often is some variation of “I tried talking with God but…He’s not listening…He didn’t do anything….nothing changed….”

Luke 11:9 says: “So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”

and then James 4:2b-4 says: “You do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures. You adulteresses, do you not know that friendship with the world is hostility towards God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.”

Wow, right? The thing is, most people know the Luke verse, but we can’t accept the Luke verse without also being aware of the James verse.

God is always listening! He never slumbers or sleeps (Psalm 121:4) but He is our Father, and He knows better than us. He is always listening. But He cares about us too much to give us something that could actually harm us. So very often, the “answer” ends up being: Wait. But not because He’s not ready. But because we’re not ready.

Our circumstances do matter to God. He cares deeply for us. We might go to God asking Him to change our circumstances – but instead, He wants to change us first. We do often have wrong motives for the things we want. We want things to be easier, happier, better. We think that somehow because we follow God, the road of life should be trouble-free. But that’s not what He told us, instead He said in John 16:33:

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”

He’s overcome the world! We aren’t at the mercy of our circumstances. He’s given us everything we need to rise above them and instead of being defeated by them, we can be changed from the inside out.

Matthew 16:24: Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.

Are we willing to deny ourselves to follow Him? Are we really following Jesus or are we asking Him to be some divine Santa Claus and just give us the things we want? I hear so many talking about how God’s not answering and yet what He might be saying is “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.”

I don’t think the problem lies with God. The problem is us. He’s waiting on us. Will we surrender the control of our life to Him? Our dreams? Our passions? Will we lay it all down to serve Him?

What is truly incredible is that if we’re willing to step back and see what we’re really being offered, we would be quick to surrender.

We are like a little child holding tightly to a fistful of dandelions. God is asking us to give them to Him. But we love our dandelions so much. We can’t imagine anything other than our dandelions. But He keeps asking us gently, “Give them to me.” When we finally do, He takes the dandelions and leads us to a garden overflowing with every flower imaginable. Gifts of every shape and color. But we can’t go into the garden until we trust Him enough to hand over the dandelions. Until we are willing to give up what we are holding onto to follow Him wherever He may lead.

What are the dandelions in your life?

~Sarah~

Photo by Brandi Jordan used under Creative Commons License

being small

May 6, 2011 in destiny & purpose, questions about faith, real life & faith with 0 Comments

There are many of us that are willing to do great things for the Lord, but few of us are willing to do little things. ~Dwight L. Moody~

I’ve been thinking a lot about this quote lately. With celebrity of every shape and size so readily accessible today, the siren call is to compare the work the Lord has given us with the work He has chosen to give another. But it’s trap. A terrible trap that we cannot afford to give into.

We cannot afford to wish that we had the

bestseller status of Karen Kingsbury

the pulpit of Joel Olsteen

the controversy of Rob Bell

the twitter followers of Ashton Kutcher

the platform of the Women of Faith

the comedic knack of Anita Renfroe

the ministry reach of ____________ (whoever owns the blog you’re stalking…)

We think that in order to do anything important we must reach some unseen level in the unseen hierarchy. If only I can reach X, then I can really do something for God. It’s just not true. It’s the little things that really matter. Our daily obedience before Him.

Will we tend the land that He gave to us even if the plot is small? Even if it’s dusty and dry and labor-some? Will we trust that our purpose isn’t diminished simply by the size of the task that He’s given us. Will we choose to believe that even though our work looks small it is no less vital to God’s heart?

The truth is, our purpose, our destiny, our great joy can simply be in serving Him. In following Him wherever He leads. So if He asks us to quietly go sweep the floors of His kingdom, will we pick up the broom and sweep to the best of our ability as an offering to Him?

I’ve been sweeping floors. For quite some time. Attending to the tasks He’s given me. But there is a pouring out of myself in the process (isn’t that what should always be happening? Less of me, more of Him?) I am so grateful for not one, but two book contracts that have come my way in the last few months. But neither will bear my name. So while I am grateful for the good and honest work that will help support the precious family I have, it’s just not the same. I will do the work and labor, and my name will not be on either of the covers. It is what it is.

I will choose to follow Him, even if I am to remain small. Obscurity is not a punishment. I think it can even be a blessing. It’s all in the way we are willing to see it. And if we really believe that the Lord is weaving together a magnificent plan, then we must also know that we cannot see the whole picture, we cannot see how vital our part and portion is. Only He can. So sweep away. In faith. In obedience. And in honor of the One who knows the beginning from the end.

Here’s to being small,

~Sarah~

 

 

Photo By: jriro2000 used under Creative Commons attribution license

broken glass

April 26, 2011 in feeling lonely & unloved, monday manna devotional, real life & faith with 5 Comments

At church on Sunday we had a bit of an accident. We were cleaning up the cafe after our Easter service and a glass syrup bottle dropped to the hard floor and shattered. Everyone froze and we were trying to figure out how to move my flip-flop wearing 11 year old daughter out from the midst of the mess when blood drops started appearing. The tiny shards of glass had sprayed all over her bare legs. We carried her out of the glass and moved her over to a table where we could get a look at the damage. Photo by Duke LeNoir - posted and used under creative commons license

The blood trips were tiny and fortunately there were no large cuts, but the tiny pieces were glinting under the lights. The blood drops bubbled dark red all over her pale legs. How were we going to clean her up? If we tried to brush them off they could cut her and cause even more damage. We couldn’t pick them off because there was no way we’d be able to find every tiny shard.

Then a man nearby, who hung around after service to talk with a newcomer, hurried over to help. “Don’t touch them,” he said. “We need water.” A cup of water was grabbed and he slowly poured the water over her legs, letting the water splash around on the table and floor. “See, the water will wash away the glass without hurting her.” We poured the water in sections, from her feet up to her knees and around every part. It took time, and it made kind of a mess, but we poured until there wasn’t one glinting piece left. Then as a final once over, we got her to the showers where we could spray her legs once again.

It could have been so much worse, so we are thankful to the Lord for protecting her. But it got me thinking.

Have you ever been sprayed with shards of “glass”? Pinpricks of pain left in your heart and soul from the thoughtless, the careless and the mean people who inhabit our world? Have you ever found yourself bleeding from a circumstance beyond your control? I have. A few months ago I had some people I trusted treat me horribly. There was no reason. There was no logic, and I felt like I had been sprayed with broken glass.

But just as that wise man who hurried over shared, you have to be careful how you handle that broken glass when it comes. You can’t ignore it, you can’t brush it away, and you can’t even try to remove it yourself. We need the “washing of the water of the Word” (Eph. 5:26) to cleanse us and make us whole. Jesus is the Living Water (John 4:10) who gently, carefully and lovingly pours Himself through us to wash away what could damage us further.

We always have a choice when we are wounded. We could turn away from help and try to deal with it ourselves – allowing the glass to fester, dig into our skins and damage our souls with bitterness and unforgiveness. The longer we wait, the deeper the glass digs in, and the harder it is to wash it away.

Or we can put ourselves – quickly – into the hands of Jesus, who will gently wash those wounds and bring healing as we stay close to Him, fill ourselves with His Word, and walk in love and forgiveness. I have seen this to be true. I have seen God be faithful. He is our stronghold. He is our Help. And He is the One who has our backs. And that’s enough. And that glass that was sprayed at me – it isn’t there anymore. Nothing pricking into my soul. Just trust and faith that the Lord will see His plan through. And I’m just going to tuck in and follow Him wherever He leads.

You can too. Lord, I pray that whoever is reading these words that knows the feeling of that broken glass, that You will draw near and wash them. That where there is brokenness and pain, they will trust You to bring healing and wholeness. That they will not cling to the pain and the glass, but that they will cling to You alone. That they will choose love and forgiveness so that they might obtain the life that You have for them. You are faithful! Amen

denying self and loneliness

April 13, 2011 in feeling lonely & unloved, real life & faith with 0 Comments

I’m still surprised by the number of times the word “lonely” appears in a list of words that people have searched online. It’s kind of strange that we’re more connected than ever, yet so many are still crying out in loneliness. There’s a song on the radio by Casting Crowns -

She is yearning
For shelter and affection
That she never found at home
She is searching
For a hero to ride in
To ride in and save the day
And in walks her prince charming
And he knows just what to say
Momentary lapse of reason
And she gives herself away

Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Or does anybody even know she’s going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple
With all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that’s tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?

Do we really see each other? And how can we reach out and love a lost and dying world when so many inside the church are feeling lost and lonely too? I care about the lost, but I feel like one of my passions has always been the church – to see the church get healthy, rise up and boldly do the work of advancing the kingdom that she was meant to do. When “inside the church” looks like “outside the church” then why would people want to come in?

So what does all this have to do with fasting? Well, a lot actually. Because the thing is – we don’t have anything good to give others unless we learn to receive it first from God. Receive what? Things like security, hope, a feeling of safety, a knowing of the great love He has for us, of being convinced of His goodness.

In this hyper-connected world, fasting can help us disconnect with the outer world and drive us to connect with God. Food is one of our most basic needs. We cannot survive without it. And Jesus calls Himself the “bread of life” (John 6:35). He wants to be our source for everything – our food yes, but the deepest needs and desires of our heart as well. Fasting is a way to remind ourselves of that deep base need we have for the Lord. And the truth is – we are never alone. But we will “feel” alone unless we can learn to connect with God intimately – every day. Just like we need food every single day, so we need Him. There are many ways to do that, but fasting can be an amazing spiritual journey.

How do you get started? Start small. Just choose to skip one meal (in advance) and then during the time you’d normally eat, spend that time talking with God, and being quiet so that you can listen. Try it. You just might find that God has something He’s been waiting to share with you.

~Sarah~

 

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