There is probably no topic that is more difficult for young adults than singleness. That longing – a God-given one – to be connected with someone. To be married. I’m definitely a proponent of “let God be in control of your love life” but it’s just hard when you’re single…and waiting.
I graduated college at 21 years old and I had never had a boyfriend. In fact, I only had one real date (and it was just pathetic so we’ll just be truthful for the record but move on.)
I didn’t become a Christian until I was nearly 18 so the “rules” of dating in the Christian world were a bit bizarre to me at first. People got together (and dumped each other) in the name of “God’s leading”. I watched my friends get their hearts crushed and yet still wondered if anyone would ever find me “worth” it.
I did believe that God loved me and cared for me but…and here’s the confession, I had this secret fear that God would bring me someone that was “good for me”. Someone who was more like brussel sprouts rather than red velvet cake. Someone who I was “supposed” to be with rather than someone I couldn’t imagine my life without.
This fear was compounded when I went to an InterVarsity camp and met a woman who was 30, loved God and was still single. My calculations left me not only with brussel sprouts and many years of waiting in front of me!
I happen to know several amazing young women who are still in that waiting phase as they approach their thirties. It does happen. And we won’t be able to see or understand the fullness of God’s plan or ways until we meet Him face to face.
But I can say – without a doubt – that God knows better than we do. In fear, we can sometimes agree to or pursue relationships because we wonder if anyone else will come along. But God doesn’t give us someone who is just good for us, He gives us – if we will wait for his best – someone who is both good for us AND someone we can’t imagine our lives without. There are brussel sprouts. But there is also red velvet cake for dessert.
~Sarah, who just celebrated 16 years with her guy ~